Professor of music theory.
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"If I tweaked it by one, it'd be a major 3rd, but I tweaked it by two, so it's an augmented 3rd."
about a particular cantus firmus: "It is a melody, it's just a crappy melody."
"I'm sorry, my segue wasn't very artful...okay, I'll get back in lecture mode."
while demonstrating a musical excerpt on the piano: "Whoops. Shit. Sorry....yeah, that was in the Urtext [a German edition of published music]. 'Scheiss'. I just translated it for you."
on a melodic analysis: "This looks like an ant. Ant structure! I'll write a dissertation on it."